Delivered Form Suicidal Thoughts And Self-Harm
Growing up, I never knew who God was. But when I finally found Jesus, I realised that my perspectives on God were different from my parents'. I had no choice but to adhere to my parents' perspectives and rules. Every time I reminded myself that God loves me and He is merciful, people around me would tell me that I was not enough and that I would still end up in hell because of the sins I had committed.
Because of that, I lived in darkness and started to experience depression. I lived my life to please others, including my parents, and I attempted suicide twice and struggled with self-harm for two years.
Some years ago, I flew to Singapore to continue my studies, contemplating ending my life here. But I still harboured a dust-sized hope. So, I asked God to give me a reason to stay alive. It could be anything or anyone, or just a specific place that I would visit once a week.
I gave myself about a year, but before that day came, I met a godly Christian friend who introduced me to the truth and brought me to New Creation Church.
The first time I went to church with him, I learned about the gospel of grace, and it blew my mind. The second time I went to church, I felt a warm sensation that compelled me to pray to God and receive His grace. I felt something inside me urging me to pray in Jesus' name, so I did, and I felt so relieved afterwards. It felt like all my burdens and negative feelings were gone. It felt so light and beautiful. The third time I went to church, I joined in the worship, singing and praying in Jesus' name.
Gradually, I found hope and a reason to stay alive. I was no longer lost in the dark because I had found the light. Without realising it, my addiction to self-harm disappeared! I used to self-harm when I felt down and stressed, but now I always seek God's help first.
I have no more scars on my wrist. I don't need to cover my scars with make-up anymore. The voices in my head that kept telling me to end my life are also gone!
Knowing that Jesus loves me saved my life. He found me when I was lost. He's a good Shepherd. I am no longer a nobody; I am a child of God. I am thankful to Jesus and grateful for being loved and saved by Him.





